Cohabitation: Couples Living Together BEFORE Marriage SURVIVAL GUIDE
“Equality appears to promote stability.”
-Ishizuka
Living together before marriage is called cohabitation. It is the step taken by couples who live together under the same roof in hopes of strengthening the amount of feelings shared. Many young adults turn to cohabitation before marriage as living together before marriage has slowly been accepted in society and in some cultures.
According to the Pew Research Center, there is a large percentage of people who admit to having cohabitated prior to marriage with a level of 59%, in comparison to a level of 50% for those people ever been married. In the United States alone, the number of people living with unmarried partners has risen from 3% to 7%.
Many couples believe that cohabitation is a good step toward marriage and that it will help in the process of strengthening the relationship quality of what two people share. Are you considering cohabiting together as a couple with your foreign woman?
There could just be numerous benefits of living together before marriage but sadly, there are also disadvantages of living together before marriage that you also have to take into consideration. Here is a survival guide if you get to decide to live with your partner:
PRO:
- Finances and financial convenience from cohabitation.
Living in the same space in which your partner resides can totally help in saving the expenses that you don’t usually need. Having a home all to yourself means that you have to pay for everything from your own pocket, and there is no one to help you control expenses.
If you cohabitate, not only will you have a finance adviser, but you will also have someone to split expenses with, making it easier for the both of you.
Prior to living together, you might find purchasing that latest video game easy to do so, but with her presence, it will make you realize that it is way better to use it for that new washing machine which is what you absolutely need.
CON:
- The possibility of a partner mooching off you can happen anytime.
Not everyone is earning the same, and this happens to you and your partner. Both of you may have good paying jobs or have worthy ways of making a living, but there is always one from you who makes higher than the other. As much as this may hurt either, the possibility of a partner mooching off financially can be a reality.
One major sign for you to know if she mooches off you is when she lets you spend even the least important expenses around the house.
Imagine yourself feeling proud as you appreciate the all new dishwasher and refrigerator you just bought and all of a sudden she asks for a little bit of cash since the crackers have run out. Well, pretty much for a red flag isn’t it?
PRO:
- Living together helps to deepen your relationship.
People believe the idea that a couple staying together can help build stronger bridges in the gaps of their relationships. This ideology has been one of the main factors that drive couples to cohabitate.
Surprisingly, it is effective. You see, both of you will be closer than ever and this helps you to become more and more transparent towards your thoughts and feelings with one another.
CON:
- Emotions at the wrong place may also be your downfall.
The mind is more powerful than we think it is and it can control many things, and one is your heart.
There may be times that you push yourself to be ready, and end up thinking and believing that you are indeed, However, as you go along, you realize how there is so much that you have not readied for and it is too late to go back.
This can happen if you cohabitate. You may somewhat find yourself believing that you are ready to live together with her, but realize later that you aren’t. If this does happen, it will only bring your relationship downhill instead.
PRO:
- Lessens the anxiety before getting married.
No person does not feel anxiety about the matter of marriage. It is one whole new chapter that changes your life forever and it is not a decision that you can undo easily.
With cohabitation, it helps people to lower the agony and doubts they currently feel. Moreover, this prevents people getting cold feet in the most unfortunate timing.
CON:
- Cohabitation does not guarantee a happy marriage.
Some studies suggest how marriage can still be hurtful for people who cohabitation beforehand. You see, it does not necessarily guarantee that a happy married life will lead you one. Factors that exist all around can still affect your relationship no matter what.
PRO:
- This way, you’ll learn about your partner’s sexual behavior, habits, and appetite.
Now that you are sharing the same space and probably sharing the same bedtime, you start learning everything about your partner’s sexual innuendos. It is healthy to know this at the early part of your relationship, rather than finding out too late that you do not meet halfway in bed. Make the most out of this, and be casually open to her when it comes to pillow talk.
CON:
- Cohabitation does not lower the possibility of marital infidelity.
You spend time together. You laugh together. Above all, you make love together. With cohabitation, all of these things are done anytime preferable for two people together.
However, this does not lower the possibility of marital infidelity towards your partner for in any minute there is, a person will still be tempted if truly wanted. In the long run, you may find the situation hurtful especially having been known for the fact that you are living together but still your partner cheats as if you don’t share the same place. Know that the levels of commitment two people give to each other always differ in some way.
Surviving Together
As you both decide that living together before marriage is the most helpful step for you, always hold one another hand in hand as you go along the journey. No battle will succeed for people who fight alone. Give your all, extend your patience, and pour out all the commitment you would need to make things work for you both. Avoid heartbreaks and survive living together with your partner before marriage.
